Growing

(Inside: God is still in control and reflection helps us see that. Here’s a powerful story from a woman who says, “Yes. God is still in control of your life.”)

“I think God is more in control of our lives than we let ourselves believe.”

I paused mid-coffee sip not because of what was said, but who said it. This woman sitting in front of me…this. woman. How do I string words together that accurately describe her? Clever, courageous, kind – she’s a go-getter. She’s experienced picket fences crumbling and putting pieces back together. She’s gone to the school of hard knocks, but also, she’s been to seminary where she dove deep into God’s word, prayer, and theology. With her collective experience and knowledge, she’s the one I ask the hard theological and life questions.

So, I know this will be good, and I encourage her to go on.

Seeing God in control

Me: “What do you mean?”

Hero friend: So, in continuing our conversation on parenting – we had two kids, then our third child was special needs, as you know.

Me: Yes, I know…

Hero friend: My husband only wanted two kids. I pushed for the third and then he was special needs. Our lives were flipped upside down with properly caring for our baby.

(Pause)

A momma always loves her babies…always. And in those early years, I had some really good days caring for my special needs youngest. But there were days when I was stretched so thin, my heart would cry out: Why does my son have to be special needs? Why are simple daily tasks so hard? Why all the challenges?

Me: I think anyone would ask those questions…we all know how much you love your baby.

Hero friend: But, then, years later, when all three of our kids graduated high school, my husband decided he was done being married. He left. I was shocked – we were supposed to grow old together.

(Pause)

Here I am single and in my sixties with my adult special-needs son living with me.

She shrugged her shoulders and continued…

Hero friend: And, do you know what? I’m so grateful for how it all came together… I’m never lonely. My son is funny, kind, and tells me how much he loves me… He helps clean the house and gets dinner going – I mean, I know not all differently-abled adults can do that, but my son can and I’m blessed. Every day, I love coming home to him.

Me (goosebumps): I can see that…

Related article: 60+ Faith-Building Best Books for Moms

Is God in control of my life? Yes – more than you think…

Hero friend: It’s like God knew… God. Knew. He knew my husband would disappoint me. So, he gifted me with this beautiful, kind special-needs boy who I GET to have live with me. I mean – of course, we have challenges, I don’t mean to paint life as perfect…

(Pause)

But life is rich and full… I think God is more in control of our lives than we let ourselves believe.

This conversation happened two years ago, and I’ve thought about her story repeatedly…

Broken friendship – I wonder how God is going to spin this so good things come out of it.

Parenting disappointments – I wonder how God is going to shape my child in a beautiful way through their experience.

Career challenges – I wonder how God is going to sharpen my professional skills because of the hard.

Sometimes people tell you the words of Romans 8:28, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”

And other times, people take their lives – and show you.

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You just dropped one kid off at practice, picked up another, and are trying to decide what to make for dinner. Your days are filled with work, parenting, and waiting for password reset emails.

You are parenting tweens and teens.

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Gift Ideas for Teenage Girls

SCHOOL
Teen, These Big Reasons are Why You’ll Like Trying Hard in School (And, no, it’s not about grades.)

FAMILY CONNECTION IDEAS
Connect as a Family Over These Conversation Starters

GROW TOGETHER IN FAITH
7 Powerful Reasons to Pray as a Family