The Single Most Important Ingredient in Getting to Know Your Kid

(Inside: Of course, we all want to get to know our kids but life can be so plain hard. Here’s a reminder to take advantage of the moments life gives us to get to know your kid.)

Clean socks dwindled, food became scarce, and the house turned into a wretched state – there was so much to accomplish.

However, I had a blessed day to stay home and plow through my to-do list with tornado force. So knee-deep in laundry and soap suds, I found myself ticking off my chores like a champion mom, and I was loving it. 

But then, my quiet son – who holds his feelings close – plopped down on the counter stool and began pouring out words.

“Mom, I’ve been wondering about…”

(Why now? Why wonder about this now? I have a list. I’ve got momentum going…)

“And mom, I’ve been thinking about if…”

(But my list… Momentum… I’ll go crazy if I don’t get this done…)

“And mom, I don’t know how to open my locker… I’ve been thinking we need to work on that…”

(Oh yeah, middle school is in a few days…)

“Mom, I also wanted to tell you about…”

(If he’s about to start sixth grade, that means he only has six summers left in our home.)




Six. Summers.

family at dinner table
Connect with your family over these 400+ conversation starters. Go out to dinner and ask these questions while you wait for your food.

So, I took a deep breath to shake off my stress-cleaning-mental-state. I walked over to my Kuerig and switched it on.

It gurgled and hissed out steamy deliciousness, doing its job of helping me switch my focus. With my warm drink in my hand, I settled next to my son and turned my full attention to his words. 

Moms, life is happening right now. These years with kids in our homes are sacred and fleeting.

But even though our heads know this – still, there is tension. Because this is also the time in our lives when we have the most pressure on us. Career. Marriage. Parenting. Adulting. It’s hard to press pause. Crazy hard. 

But, still…

But. Still.

Life is happening right now and these years with our kids in our homes are sacred and fleeting. 

So, not always, but more often than not, we remind ourselves of this and stop our work. We realize that our kids seem to always choose to unload their thoughts at the most inconvenient times, but we roll with it anyway. 

Because the easiest way to get to know our kids is to listen when they talk. 

Six summers left for my oldest. He’ll be gone in a heartbeat.
All of our children will.

So, when they decide they want to chat – especially if they’re naturally reserved – let’s try to remember to seize the moment. We’ll never regret getting to know our kids when they were at home.

And really what’s the big deal if we don’t have clean socks? That’s what flip-flops are for.


Continue to get to know your kid better by reading the full create family connection series

We all want to feel connected to our family. I know, I do. 

One of my favorite things to do with my family is to create family time. Yes, life gets busy, and no I don’t do this all perfectly (who actually does!?!), but it sure is fun to try. 

I hope you enjoy these family connection articles and ideas too…

Create Family Connection Series

Know Your Child: One Way to Learn How Your Kid Feels Loved

Parenting Tweens: Annoying Ways Tweens Show Their Parents They Love Them
7 Reasons Why Raising Tweens & Teens is the Best

Celebrating Real Love This Valentine’s Day With My Family

know your kid
Join this community of moms raising tweens and teens HERE.

Join this community of moms raising tweens and teens

Your brain bounces between your day at work, what time(s) your kids need to be at practice, your teen’s missing school assignments, that you haven’t called your mom lately, the load of the laundry to be switched, “What’s for dinner?” and “Why are 3 of my brain-tabs frozen?” 

You are raising tweens and teens and college-age kids – the unique parenting phase where everything gets easier…and harder.

Join our community of raising big kids and get occasionally email encouragements in your inbox. It’s free and you can unsubscribe at any time. 

gifts for moms
know your kid
Join this community of moms raising tweens and teens HERE.