(Inside: When life knocks you down, you are in a perfect position to pray. When life knocks you down, seek God – then, get back up and fight harder. Here are 6 steps to try…)
A note before you start reading: I highly recommend professional help. If you can’t move past your struggle and the pain feels overwhelming there are amazing professionals out there who want to help you. Make your number one goal be to find a qualified and competent person to help you walk through and past your life challenge. Persist until you find the right doctor/counselor/psychologist. You got this, strong momma!
What to do When Life Knocks You Down & You’re Tired of Your Struggle
(6 Steps to Try)
You know how outside elements – hail, debris, or small rocks – have bounced off the windshield of your car with no damage a thousand times before? But then, for whatever reason, perhaps the size of the debris, the angle it hits, or the speed you’re driving, one tiny pebble pounds into your windshield and starts a spider web of cracks.
Have you also had moments in your life like that? A difficult relationship, a tricky situation, an illness, expectations that blew up in your face… You’ve weathered similar storms before, but this time’s different. In this situation, it’s the pebble that started splitting your windshield in wild directions.
You can’t shake it off; you can’t move forward. You’re stuck in a deep valley.
It’s frustrating because you want to be a person of great faith, like Elijah, an Old Testament prophet. When Israel’s rulers had turned to Baal worship and killed God’s prophets, Elijah walked into this toxic situation and challenged the Baal prophets to a Who’s-God-Will-Supernaturally-Set-Their-Altar-On-Fire Contest. Baal ignored his praying, dancing, and cutting themselves prophets. Yet when Elijah prayed, flames consume his sacrifice. Then Elijah prayed for the drought plaguing the land to end – and the sky broke open (I Kings 18). Elijah was certain the One True God would prevail, and he was right.
That confidence, that faith – I want it.
Step 1: Do your best to remove yourself from the stressful situation.
Yet, if you read on we see a different side of Elijah (I Kings 19). Israel’s rulers weren’t exactly happy about this display of glory. Elijah received a vengeful message that the queen was going to have him killed.
After this big magnificent faith-building moment – that confident Elijah – he ran. He ran like Forrest Gump. Then sat down, deep in the wilderness, and prayed he might die.
See that last threat – one he’d received before and weathered – it was the rock that flew up and formed the first crack in his windshield.
Step 2: Take care of your physical needs.
So what did God do with this man who was fearful, anxious, depressed, and wanting to die? Surely God told him what we tell ourselves: Shake it off, be stronger, and move forward.
Yet that’s not what God did…
Instead, He had him sleep and eat.
Step 3: Keep with your normal routine, or start a new routine to give yourself something to focus on as your mind processes the situation.
Then God gave him a break from the situation and from making decisions; He had Elijah travel forty days to Horeb, the Mountain of God. He gave Elijah the gift of mindless purpose, time to think and process his experience as he walked.
Step 4: Talk to God & listen for His response.
Then once Elijah reached his destination, God finally asked him what was wrong. Elijah poured out his frustrations and God responded:
“‘Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the Lord, for the Lord is about to pass by.’ Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper.” (I Kings 19:11-12, NIV)
God’s voice was in the whisper. And that’s where God revealed to Elijah his next steps.
Step 5: Know that God will get you through your pain in His timing.
God didn’t expect Elijah to snap out of it. He didn’t criticize Elijah for his lack of faith, his deep sorrow and depression, his fear, and his reaction of running away. Instead, He had him take care of his body, remove himself from the situation, and take time to heal. Then, God reminded Elijah that His voice is heard in the quiet.
Elijah was STILL a man of great faith despite the cracks in his life. You can be strong and feel weak. You can be a woman of faith and go through dark periods. You can still be a healthy person, yet be in the winter season of your life. It’s okay to not be okay.
Sometimes, God calls us to rest.
Stop trying to make decisions. Stop trying to figure out why. Stop with the “What ifs?” Stop the noise.
Just rest in Him.
Step 6: Stick close to God and trust healing will come.
God uses lots of different ways to heal us. Like Elijah, God healed different parts of his cracks in different ways including taking care of his body, time, and encouragement. For you, it might be counseling, friends, inspirational books, doctors/medication…
But, for Elijah – and for us – what tied all the healing together was going back to the source.
And listening to the soul stirrings of God. In the processes, we let God minister to us trusting He will..ever so slowly…one by one…stitch up our cracks. Then one day, perhaps when we least expect it, we’ll think about the situation that tangled our lives and realize our memories aren’t causing us so much pain anymore. We can maybe even see ways that God revealed Himself in the situation. And perhaps even see how good came from the devastating.
One day…we’ll wake up and realize we are healed.
Hands down, the best book I’ve read on Healing is (Amazon Affiliate link) It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way by Lysa Terkurest. I’ve read it multiple times. I read it during the calm to prepare me for the next storm, it’s just that good.
When life knocks you down, find more hope by reading the full “Grow Your Grit” Series
When we become moms a light switch is flipped on. In juggling work, family, and household – we grow bolder; we learn to speak up. And somewhere in it all, we find our inner Mama Bear. We grow our determination, knowledge, love, patience, endurance, perspective, wisdom, and problem-solving ability – we strengthen our grit. It’s not always easy, though. Growing our grit through motherhood is most definitely a process… Read on…
FIND PEACE IN THE CHAOS
One Line to Get You Through the Stressed Mom Days
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Cheryl is a mom of 3 boys, wife, speaker, high school teacher, and author of Empowered Moms & Kids. She has a Master’s degree in Educational Leadership and is passionate about learning and teaching. On www.empoweredmomsandkids.com you’ll find inspiration and encouragement for moms raising tweens and/or teens. Read more in the “about” section of this page.